


Looking West

by zeldadestry



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Community: rs_small_gifts, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-11-29
Updated: 2009-11-29
Packaged: 2017-10-09 21:52:12
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,233
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/91986
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zeldadestry/pseuds/zeldadestry
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Running away means running to Remus.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Looking West

**Author's Note:**

> This was written for maraudersaffair, based on the prompt "The Book Catcher in the Rye as inspiration."

It's been about a year and a half since Sirius last visited Remus at home. For a week in July they'd slept outside at night, under the stars, and sometimes Sirius couldn't resist turning into Padfoot and howling at the moon before curling up at the foot of Remus's sleeping bag.

Sirius's satchel is slung over the chair at Remus's desk and right now it contains all his worldly possessions. The Potters are away until the end of the year, but he supposes he'll be spending a lot more time there from here on out. Remus's parents don't really like having visitors because everything has to be reported to, and approved by, officials from the Ministry. It's easier to live like hermits and, barring unexpected begging strays, they do.

He lies down on Remus's bed, reaches his hand out for the nearest book on the nightstand. It's "The Little Prince", a Muggle book Remus always cites as a childhood favorite, and he flips through it slowly, appreciating the simple lines of the drawings and the translucent wash of the watercolors. Remus has marked, in dark blue ink, under the words: "It is the time you have wasted for your rose that makes your rose so important." Sirius reads the sentence out loud, slowly, his finger tracing the path of Remus's pen.

Remus. He's made a fool of himself for Remus's sake, but he doesn't care, he's always making a fool of himself. Just before the holidays, he found Remus alone in their room at school, curled up on his bed. His back was to the door, but Sirius could see his face reflected in the mirror hanging on the front of their wardrobe. "What is it?" Sirius asked, closing the door behind him. "What's wrong?"

Remus wiped a tear away with the side of his thumb, but his voice was steady when he finally spoke. "It's nothing. It doesn't matter." Of course it mattered, anything that made Remus so unhappy mattered and Sirius hurried over to him. Remus rose to sitting at his approach, and Sirius sat down beside him on the bed, pulled Remus into his arms and kissed him. Sirius kissed his temples and the tip of his nose, kissed his smooth cheeks and the stubble of his jaw, kissed the top of his head and the side of his neck, kissed Remus everywhere he was permitted, for when he tried to bring his lips to Remus's own, Remus pulled away.

"Sirius?" Remus calls from the hall. Sirius bounds across the room and wraps Remus up in a hug as soon as he opens the door to his bedroom. "What are you doing here?" Remus asks, patting Sirius a few times on the shoulder before slipping out of his demanding grasp.

"Don't you mean it's good to see me? You better be happy to see me."

Remus smiles. His cheeks are flushed, if only from the cold outside. "Of course I am."

"I left home."

"Obviously."

"No, I mean - for good."

The smile vanishes. "Are you alright?"

"Now I am."

Remus unwinds his scarf, slides off his hat, and pulls off his gloves, then carefully returns them to the top drawer of his dresser. "James still in Ireland?"

"Damn it, Moony."

"Is he?"

"You know he is, but that's not why I'm here."

"No?"

If that's a dare, he'll take it. "I'm here because - because- look, this is exactly where I want to be."

"Really."

Sirius reaches out his hand to hold Remus's wrist. "Really." He doesn't say anything else, just strokes his thumb across the tender inside of Remus's forearm.

"I'm glad you're here," Remus finally says.

 

After the Lupins come upstairs to bed, Sirius and Remus sneak downstairs. Sirius brings out a bottle of firewhiskey from his bag and they sit at the kitchen table to share it. "Do you know what I'm going to do?" Sirius says, once he starts to feel a little dizzy, starts to feel like he can conquer anything.

"Stay here or at the Potters until we go back to school?"

"No. See, that's exactly what I'm not going to do. I've got this plan, it's perfect, I can't believe I never thought of it before. Are you ready?"

"Just spit it out."

"California. I'm going to California."

"The States?"

"Yeah. California, where no one knows me, where I can start a completely different life. I bet no one there's ever even heard of my rotten family. And, just in case someone has, I'll use a fake name."

"What?"

"Stubby Boardman."

"You're insane."

"I'm not."

"How will you make money?"

"That's the brilliant part. Remember I said I'd been working on a flying motorbike? That kind of magic's allowed by the Ministry in the States. I could be a mechanic."

"Stubby Boardman's Flying Motorbikes."

"Stubby Boardman's World Famous Flying Motorbikes, thank you very much."

"You're not serious, Sirius."

"I am, Moony. I am serious Sirius, in thought, word, and deed."

"Don't you want to finish school?"

"No. I'm sick of it. Hogwarts is lousy with bastards, including my own brother, have you noticed?"

Remus finishes off his glass and Sirius pours more for him. "Thanks. You know, I always wanted to learn how to surf."

"So come with me."

"I can't."

"Why not? I've got some money saved, just until we get the bike shop started."

"Think, Sirius. Other than attending Hogwarts, I'm not allowed to go beyond a fifteen mile radius of my own home without informing the Ministry."

Sirius slumps against the back of his chair. Idiot. He's a complete idiot, flaunting his freedom in front of his friend. "Some day the laws will change."

Remus raises his glass. "I'll see you in California then." He drains his liquor, then stands and walks over to the sink.

Sirius follows, stands beside him and puts his own glass down. Remus turns on the water and grabs a dish sponge. "What should I do, Moony?"

"You know, James would miss you awfully if you left."

"Only James?"

The corner of Remus's mouth lifts. "I'd miss Padfoot, maybe. You? Not so much."

"Liar." They're so close together that Sirius only has to shift his weight a little to the right to feel the heat of Remus's body down the side of his own. "I won't go, not today."

"And tomorrow?" Remus rinses the soap from the glasses.

"I'll stay through tomorrow, at least."

"And the day after that?"

"I'll stay for as long as you like. What do you say to that?"

Remus finishes drying the glasses. "I think that's best." He leans into Sirius for a moment, and then moves away to put the glasses in the cupboard.

Sirius stays right behind him so that, when Remus turns around again, they're facing each other. "You're always so reasonable, Moony."

"You never are. Someone has to be."

"Why?"

"Because actions have consequences."

"What if they didn't?" Sirius says, bringing a hand to rest softly, lightly, against the hollow of Remus's lower back, an invitation gracing the curve of his spine. "What if we woke up every morning with a blank slate, and everything that happened in the night was just like a dream?"

Remus grabs the front of Sirius's shirt with both hands and yanks him forward. "Then I would take everything I want," he says, and presses his open mouth to Sirius's parted lips.

**Author's Note:**

> Book/fic links: Holden tries to comfort Jane with kisses (but never reaches her mouth!) in Chapter 12. Holden fantasizes about going "out West" in Chapter 25. "lousy with bastards" is a tip of the hat to two of Holden's oft-used words.


End file.
